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Working Through It- Part 2 of 6: Wispy Wishes

Please excuse this selfish series.

I can be empathetic to a fault. I can feel and care intensely to the point it hinders my mental health and ability to function. I kept informed, spread awareness, signed petitions, participated in viral campaigns, worked on political art, continually rotated fundraising videos who would donate to causes on my behalf, yet still it felt like it was always not enough and I was afraid of doing it wrong. With my health and my family, I cannot protest in the streets but was doing everything I could think of to help while quarantined and trying to encourage the same from others, but still emotionally it felt like nothing more than throwing lofty wishes in the wind. The more I saturated myself in this cause, the less care I treated myself with. Let me be clear: it is NOT the movement's fault that I am this way. I live an extremely high-stress life to start with that is largely out of my control, but I have never felt afraid of being harmed for the color of my skin. There is a balancing act of interpersonal and extrapersonal care that I have been failing in, and I have to change about myself to effectively help.

Please, do not forget the murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Derrik Scott, and so many others. Do not forget the apathy by predominantly white law enforcement over the deaths of Tete Gulley, Tamla Horsford, and so many others. Please do not forget that any one of these people could easily become one of your loved ones if we do not do something about it.

While BLM predominantly focuses on black racism, it fights the same mindsets that encompass all racism in America. Where is Vanessa Guillen and why was her disappearance treated how it was?

Educate yourself. Empower yourself to do what's right, even if it feels like a seed cast off in the breeze. Every single seed has the potential to grow. I hope some day soon this land will be covered in the beautiful blossoms of equality it falsely boasts about itself, resilient, strong, and united.